I suppose right now would be the best time to do this.
Tolle does say that it is the only thing that is real, this NOW. And according to him, the only way I can embrace what is real is if I let go of the insanity of time; the illusion of a past that haunts (because of tragedy or loss of something beautiful) and the anxiety of a dreadful future.
On many different levels I agree with him.
That identifying with the past is nonsensical (unless we use it to humbly learn) and worrying or agonizing about the future is equally idiotic (since we already live in a world that believes we are able to deliberately create what we want, in exactly the way we want it. I know this is easier said than done sometimes but changing that mindset is the beginning. ) And actually, how all of that creating happens in the NOW.
Which brings me back to my point. I need to do two things right NOW to authentically embrace the NOW.
I have to say thank you for the reign of the queen. But goodbye to the time and the selves that we were then too. I am truly grateful that things were that way. That I had experienced that kind of love and devotion. I deserved it. We deserved it. I learned that that still existed/s and that it will one day be that way again. Because these things move in cycles. And NOW is the way it should be. It only becomes tarnished when I compare it to the queen. When really, I am just grateful. Also, farewell to Harry Houdini. That complex thing happened and today I let it go. It does not define him or me or us anymore. It just happened. I have no more need to be afraid of it happening again. Because it hasn’t and it won’t. I am refusing to add another day for it to haunt me.
Whether good or bad past, I say adios. I own you so I have the power to let you go. So thanks and goodbye. I let both of these things go today.
So NOW can just be the great thing that it is.
Next, I have to say — hello things to come and I only know you from the best of vibrations. Sandman has been challenging me these past few weeks but I know that he is just helping me cope. So no, you are not even based on my nightmares and my dreams. Instead I have begun to be the witness. Then the deliberate creator of everything that is meant to be. The best of all things. So, you get to wait. Not me. Because nobody waits in the NOW. You can twist and turn, pirouette or throw a tantrum; you can scream and have a shit fit, or be a passive aggressive saboteur who emotionally blackmails me with images and triggers and the insane jealous gene. You can do all that. And that’s fine. Because there is no boogeyman if the light is on. This future from hell only exists in the demented boundaries of a mind that has been spoiled rotten. And its really only a matter of time for these demons to turn into mist. or sand. or light. Because I am not longer my mind since I have decided to be its witness. I see the leaves. I can really see the leaves.
In the end, all I have is me who won’t let me down; NOW that is real and the power to say thank you and goodbye; and hello but you can’t hurt me.
Be kind, no longer rewind.
Be bold, a new story must be told.
Take a bow, the only that is real is NOW.
grateful slice: letting go and license to write bad poetry.